One of Those Days
by SuperBlueGirl12
Summary: First attempt at a Grey's fic! Arizona is called into the ER in the early hours of the morning, will the accident coming in be too much for her to handle? R&R please!
1. This is Your Life

**Hey guys! **

**As you can probably tell, i havent updated anything in ages and for that i appologise!  
>severe case of writers block came upon me!<strong>

**so i thought i would try something different to get myself back into writing. **

**This is my first attempt at a fic that isnt Glee related! **

**Please give me feedback, i love to hear what you think.**

**And with regards to the medical stuff, i know nothing! so dont judge me on that alone! **

**xxx**

* * *

><p><strong>This is your life<strong>

She was awakened early that morning to the sound of her pager going off. It was so early that the morning light hadn't even thought about peeking through the curtains. Groaning as she rolled over, Arizona fumbled around on the nightstand for the source of the annoying high pitched beeping in hopes of silencing it. She eventually placed her hand on the small black box and lifted it over her eyes, barely opening them to see what was so important that she was being made to get up in the dark. However the three numbers that flashed along the tiny screen were enough to make her wide awake. 911. Sitting up, she threw the covers off of herself and stepped out of the security of her bed and into the cold of the darkened room. She heard Calliope stir next to her but the brunette didn't wake. Arizona was thankful seeing as her girlfriend had only been in for a few hours. She watched silently as Callie rolled onto her back and lifted an arm above her head, falling deeper into her well deserved sleep. Arizona smiled to herself and pushed the blonde hair from out of her eyes, walking around to the dresser and pulling out jeans and a shirt. She left a not for Callie so that she wouldn't worry when she woke up alone. Then, without even a shower or a cup of coffee, she was out of the door and on her way to the hospital.

She burst through the doors to the ER about ten minutes later, hers and Callie's apartment only being across the street, changed into her scrubs and ready for work. She saw the familiar faces of Owen Hunt, the on call trauma surgeon for the night, Miranda Bailey, Alex Karev, Lexie Grey and Jackson Avery along with a few assorted interns. 'Robbins.' Hunt called as he saw her coming, jogging over to him with Alex at his back.

'Owen,' She greeted, tying her hair up into a ponytail even though a few curly strands always managed to escape. 'What have we got?' She queried the page at three in the morning.

'Family of five in a small vehicle, rear left side collision with a food delivery truck.' He informed her, all of the surgeons going out into the waiting bay and getting ready for their patients arrival.

'Okay, so what do we know for sure?' Arizona asked, turning to Bailey who had a sad look on her face. 'Bailey, what?'

'Four of them are children.' Miranda informed her.

'Four?' Arizona repeated to make sure.

'Yeah, the paramedics called from the scene. Male driver, who we assume is the father. A teenage passenger in the front seat.' Owen gave her all the facts.

'And the three in the back?' Arizona looked at him with pleading eyes.

'All under the age of ten.' Alex finished for him.

'Well what were they doing driving around so early?' She wondered out loud.

'We don't know, we weren't told much. Only to be prepared.' Owen said, only breaking his eye contact with Arizona when the sound of sirens could be heard coming closer. 'Okay, I want Avery and Grey to take care of the father who will be in ambulance one. Karev and Bailey, ambulance two will be carrying the teenager and then Robbins.' He turned back to her and she nodded. She didn't need him to tell her that they would be taking care of the three young children, she only hoped that their injuries weren't that bad. 'Everyone take your interns with you, and interns,' He turned to them as they flocked in the background. 'Try and be useful, do not get in the way.' As soon as Owen had finished handing out orders the first of the ambulances came around the corner. It screeched to a halt next to the emergency room doors and immediately a paramedic pushed open the back. She pulled out a man on a stretcher and began talking as Avery and Lexie went over to them.

'Simon Walker, forty-nine, mild concussion with a severe laceration above his left eye. Conscious upon arrival but slightly panicked so we gave him morphine for the pain and to calm him down. No signs of further injury.' Said the paramedic.

'Thank you.' Owen walked up to her as Mr Walker was wheeled off by his doctors. 'Do you have any information on the other victims?'

'Only that Mr Walker is the most healthy.' She replied, Arizona's heart falling at the realisation that she had a good chance of loosing at least one child tonight. 'The truck struck the rear left of the car, Mr Walker being the furthest away from the impact and obviously the least at risk.'

'Okay,' Owen nodded, the paramedic getting back into her rig and heading off. No later than a few moments the second ambulance came speeding around the corner, the teenager. Bailey and Karev got in position as the doors opened and revealed another stretcher, this time occupied by a smaller person.

'Jamie Walker, fifteen, several large lacerations to the face and left arm. Stabilised in the field but hasn't re-gained consciousness.' The paramedic said as he got out of the rig. The boy was unconscious as Alex got to him, looking over the boy and seeing more injuries.

'What caused the damage to his leg?' Alex asked, lifting the blood soaked sheet that was covering him.

'It was crushed when the truck made impact, it swung around and basically bashed in the entire left side of the car.'

'Page Torres.' Owen ordered, seeing the severity of the boys leg wound, they needed the best.

'Okay, we're in bay three.' Karev informed Hunt as he and Bailey wheeled the boy through the hospital doors.

'Owen, she's had a long night, can't you get Sloan?' Arizona pleaded, wanting to make sure Callie wasn't over working herself. But before he could respond the third ambulance was stopped in front of them. Two paramedics got out with distressed looks on their faces as Owen and Arizona stepped up to the rig.

'What have we got?' Owen asked as the kids were pulled out of the ambulance.

'Natalie and Sarah Walker, eight year old twins. Natalie was on the left side of the car so suffered the worst of it. Unconscious at the scene, with multiple face, neck and arm lacerations. Possible crushed pelvis and left leg. Her abdomen was rigid upon exam. She coded once on route but we were able to revive her, pulse is weak but steady for the moment. Sarah was on the opposite side of the car. She has a severe concussion, broken right wrist from impact and neck and back strain from the force of the collision.' Arizona stopped and looked down at the twins. Both unconscious and fighting for their lives. Natalie's face was covered in blood and Arizona could barely tell where she was injured.

'Okay.' Owen said, breaking her out of her trance. 'I've paged Sloan and Sheppard and a heard of interns, we need all hands on deck and Robbins I need you to take care of the youngest one.'

'Yeah, okay.' Arizona nodded, swallowing harshly as she watched Owen wheel the twins away before turning her attention to the second paramedic who emerged from the ambulance. 'Oh my god.' She whispered as soon as she saw him, wheeling out a small gurney with a tiny body on it.

'Nicholas Walker, eighteen months old. He was in a car seat between the two girls.' The paramedic informed Arizona but she found that hard to believe. She had never seen so much blood on such a small child.

'Wasn't he strapped in?' She asked, not being able to take the panic out of her voice as she stepped up and looked over the tiny human.

'He was strapped into the car seat, but the car seat wasn't strapped into the car.'

'What?' Arizona looked away from the child and up to the paramedic, as much sadness in his eyes as there were in her own. What kind of parent forgets to strap their child safely into the car.

'He was gone when we got to the scene but we brought him back. He has a pulse, barely, massive head and abdominal injuries which caused him to code once more on the way over but he came back.'

'Erm, right.' Arizona acknowledged him but was trying to figure out what to look at first. There was so much blood. She wheeled the gurney through the doors with the help of her interns and saw April manning the pit. 'Kepner, Kepner I need you over here.' She shouted, wheeling the child into bay five with April running in behind her.

'Oh Jesus.' She said, covering her mouth with her hand as she watched the scene in front of her unfold. Arizona was covered in blood, and all of it from the small child on the table in front of her. The interns were trying their best to hook the child up to the machines but he was so tiny and it was hard for them all to manoeuvre at once.

'I know April but I need your hands. There's too much bleeding so I need you to help me locate the source.' Arizona ordered, the resident just standing there in shock. 'April!' Arizona shouted, snapping her out of it.

'Right, sorry, erm, okay..' She mumbled, moving towards the table and going over every inch of the child's body. He hadn't moved since Arizona had gotten her hands on him, the beeping of his heart monitor slowing as she frantically tried to stop all of the bleeders. April gently moved round to the back of his head and noticed a large amount of the blood was coming from there.

'Doctor Robbins.' She said nervously as Arizona joined her.

'Damn it, he's bleeding out too quickly.' She looked back up at April. 'Get Sheppard in here now.' She said, watching as Kepner hurried out of the doors to find the neurosurgeon. As soon as she did Nicholas flat-lined. 'No, no, damn it!' She shouted. Moving around to his side and started compressions. 'Come on, come on little man.' She pleaded. Her eyes filling with tears quickly as she realised there was nothing more she could do. Minutes passed as she tried everything she could to bring him back, but it was no use. She heard the doors open as April returned with Derek but she didn't look up. Most of the interns and nurses had stopped moving, only Arizona was left trying to resuscitate the child.

'Doctor Robbins.' April said gently, but the peds surgeon did not look up.

'Arizona.' Derek spoke softly, moving around to the other side of the room. He placed a hand on her shoulder but she didn't stop. 'Arizona, he's gone. You need to call it.' He said sadly.

'No, no I can't…' She whispered, focusing on counting in her head.

'Arizona, there are other children out there who need you. Sometimes you have to let them go.' He whispered, a tear falling over her cheek as he did so and she finally stopped. She looked up at the clock and wiped the tear from her face.

'Time of death, three twenty-seven am.' And with that she walked out of the room and back into the chaos.

'…**This is yourself. Falling away. You reached for the sun. Afraid of the day. Quit counting your tears. You're here in the world. And this is your life….' **


	2. Running Down

**Running Down**

Arizona pushed through the doors to bay three where the twins were being worked on, Owen on one side with Lexie and they had been joined by Callie, who looked sleepier than ever. 'Hey,' She said as she saw Arizona walk into the room. But then became concerned with the look on her girlfriend's face and the amount of blood covering her. 'You okay?' Callie asked.

'Fine, what's their status?' Arizona asked emotionlessly. She could not afford to get any more emotional about this.

'Sarah looks okay, she has a broken wrist which Doctor Torres has set. We need to get her up to the ICU to be on the safe side but hopefully she'll regain consciousness soon. We'll know more once we've done some tests.' Alex informed her.

'Good, take her up.' Arizona said, watching Lexie leave with the healthier twin. Owen looked up at Arizona and then to Torres.

'Doctor Robbins, are you alright?' He asked, watching her look over Natalie.

'I'm fine.' She repeated, looking over the girls injuries. 'She needs surgery doesn't she?' She looked up at her girlfriend.

'She does. She's stable at the moment so Owen and I were getting ready to take her up to fix the crushed pelvis and broken leg.' Callie informed her.

'Dr Robbins, Bailey has her hands full with the teenager so can you scrub in. Her abdomen is rigid so we need to relieve some of the pressure and I could use more hands.' Owen asked, looking at her worriedly.

'Yeah sure, let me get cleaned up and I'll meet you up there.' She smiled unconvincingly and set off.

'We'll be in OR 3.' Owen called after her before turning to Torres. 'Is she okay?'

'I, I don't know.' Callie admitted. 'She was fine last night, and from the note she left me this morning I assume she was alright then too.' Owen raised a questioning eyebrow at her. 'Never mind, I'll ask her later.'

'Okay, lets go save a life then.' He smiled, wheeling the gurney out of the room and headed for the operating floor.

'Don't you want to page Christina? She'll be mad at you.' Callie informed him.

'I know, but she worked a twenty-two hour day yesterday, she needs her sleep.'

'Right so what about big Grey?' Callie asked.

'The same, Derek didn't want to wake her.' Owen informed her.

'You know I worked the same hours as they did right?' Callie asked, walking on the other side of the gurney.

'I know, Arizona wanted to let you sleep.'

'Okay, why didn't you?' She asked.

'Because I needed the best hands on deck.' Owen grinned, Callie looking at him surprised. 'But don't tell Christina.' Callie laughed as they headed into the elevator.

Arizona stood and looked at herself in the mirror. She wasn't sure how she got blood on her face but she had managed to somehow, wiping it off with soap and the towel she kept in her cubby. She was washing her face when the sensation came over her. She had just lost an eighteen month old baby who was covered in so much blood she couldn't find the source in time to stop it. The thought made her sick to her stomach, and that's exactly what she was. She gagged before leaning over the trash can in the lounge and coughed up most of her insides. A few moments later she was back on her feet and rinsing her mouth out with water, once again looking into her own blue eyes as she relearned how to breathe. 'Come on Arizona, pull it together.' She whispered, turning off the taps and heading up to the OR floor. Derek was right, there were other children that needed her. It was Natalie at the moment but she didn't doubt that being the most senior paediatric surgeon in the hospital she would be seeing all the Walker children at some point. With one final breath she pulled a clean white jacket over her arms and headed out, pushing aside all of the panic she felt rising in the pit of her stomach.

'Okay, I'm here.' Arizona said, somewhat more cheerfully as she stepped into the operating room. 'How is she?' Arizona asked once she saw neither Owen nor Callie were actually doing anything.

'She became slightly unstable on the way up so we need you to go in first.' Owen informed her. 'Maybe if we can sort out her abdominal issues we can keep her under for longer, give us a better chance of fixing the broken bones.'

'Okay, lets do it then.' Arizona said confidently, walking over to the table and preparing to cut. She swallowed and looked down at the child on the table before saying; 'Scalpel.' Two hours later and Arizona was still working on Natalie, the force of the collision had made her abdomen become rigid, compromising some of her organs with lots of internal bleeding that Arizona couldn't seem to get under control, even with Owen's superb hands there to help.

'Come on.' She whispered to herself, looking through a mess of damage. 'There's too much blood, she's bleeding out!' Arizona yelled, looking over to one of the nurses. 'Hang another bag please.' She ordered, the nurse doing so, but Arizona still feared that it wouldn't be enough. 'Damn it, damn it!' She heard herself yelling for the second time that morning. 'I can't see the bleeder, Owen?'

'No, me neither, it's a mess in here.' He sighed, rummaging around the left side of Natalie's body as Arizona looked over the right. Callie was watching intently, watching her Arizona frantically trying to save this girls life. And she was worried. Suddenly the heart monitor stopped and a long beeping noise was echoing throughout the room.

'She's coding!' Arizona said, 'Crash cart!' Owen started packing the wound, trying to stop the bleeding that way whilst they tried to get her heart back in business. He then moved up to her chest and began compressions whilst the machine was warming up.

'Still nothing.' He said, looking up to Arizona.

'Charge at two hundred.' She said, watching the nurse start the charge and then stepping up to the table. 'Clear!' She shouted, shocking Natalie and watching her body bounce slightly up from the table.

'No change.' Owen looked at the machine and then back to Arizona who was already charging again at two-fifty.

'Charging at two-fifty, clear.' She said, shocking the child once more. There was still no change.

'No pulse.' Owen said sadly, feeling that they had lost her, but Arizona couldn't loose another child today. She put the paddles down and thumped the girl once on the chest.

'Arizona!' Callie called. 'She's gone.'

'No, she isn't.' Arizona said firmly, watching the monitor as she administered the compressions, hoping for any change. One spark of life.

'Arizona.' Callie whispered, the OR now completely silent apart from the flat line on the monitor. 'Arizona.' Callie said, wrapping her arms around her shoulders and pulling her back from the table. 'She's gone.'

'No, Callie, I can't..' Arizona said quietly, her eyes betraying her as they filled up with tears. 'I can't loose another one.' She said, Callie turning Arizona to face her.

'You did everything you could. You did not loose her.' Callie reassured her, but Arizona only broke down more when she heard Owen.

'Time of death six thirteen am.' He said, switching the monitor off and leaving them in silence.

'…**..I can't even scream. I can't even let it out. I can't see the blood running down my face again…..'**


	3. If I Handle You With Care

**If I handle you with care**

Callie led Arizona through the operating floor hallways, Bailey giving her a worried glance as she walked out of OR 2. Callie shook her head at the general surgeon and continued to storm past everything. She had one arm around Arizona's waist as they walked hastily on, until they reached the lounge and were finally alone. Arizona wriggled out of her girlfriend's grasp and walked across the room, not turning around to face Callie, even after she heard the door close. The silence was only broken by Arizona sobbing gently to herself. 'Arizona…' Callie whispered, walking slowly over to her. The blonde turned around and Callie saw the pain in her eyes, blue pools of sorrow framed by a tired expression.

'There were four kids in that car Callie, and I lost two of them.' She said gently. Callie walked closer to her and put a hand on either cheek, making sure Arizona kept eye contact and really listened.

'Arizona, you did everything you could.' Callie said, holding on tighter when she felt her girlfriend pulling away. 'You did. Alright. I didn't see the first kid, but Natalie had incredibly severe injuries. You gave her a fighting chance and she just couldn't hold on long enough for us to help her. It was not your fault.' Callie sent a pleading look into Arizona's eyes. 'You hear me?' Arizona nodded as Callie let go of her face and they slowly sat down together.

'Nicholas.' Arizona whispered.

'What?' Callie didn't hear her as she lent over to brush a few straggling tears from her cheeks.

'His name, the first kid. It was Nicholas.'

'Okay.' Callie nodded, she knew Arizona needed to get everything out of her system so she would sit there and listen to her all night if she had to.

'He was eighteen months old Calliope. He was so tiny and covered in.. in blood.' She swallowed, staring forwards at nothing in particular but she could feel her girlfriend's eyes fixed on her. 'I have never seen anything like that Callie. Never.' She turned to face the Latina. 'And it scared the hell out of me.' She started to cry again but Callie quickly pulled her in for another hug.

'I know.' She said comfortingly. 'I know it gets scary sometimes.' She felt Arizona grip onto the back of her scrubs, pulling her in as close as she possibly could before relaxing. They sat in the same position for what seemed like an eternity. In reality it was about ten minutes. Ten minutes before Arizona pulled away from Callie's touch and lent back in the chair she was sitting in. She had stopped crying but her voice was hoarse and croaky, licking her lips before she spoke, she said;

'What am I going to tell their father? The other kids?' Arizona asked, looking to Callie for all the answers.

'I don't know.' She replied honestly. 'But I think we should go and see how they are before doing anything else.'

'Yeah, you're right.' Arizona said, standing up and straightening out her dark blue scrubs, looking in the mirror and did her best at hiding the redness surrounding her eyes.

They left the lounge and went in search of the other family members. A part of Arizona wanted to kill the father. I mean, who doesn't strap a car seat into the actual car? And what was he doing driving around so late at night with young children? They turned the corner and saw Bailey once more, the smaller woman coming over to them. 'Is everything okay?' She asked, looking over their faces.

'Fine.' Arizona lied. 'What happened with the teenager?'

'Jamie is going to be okay. He'll need a lot of physical-therapy to walk again, and he'll have a nasty headache in the morning but he's alive.' Bailey answered, again looking over their faces.

'Arizona, Hunt told me you lost the twin.' Arizona merely nodded whilst Bailey kept analysing. 'And you lost the infant?' She asked, Arizona nodded once more. 'Are you sure you're alright?'

'Bailey she's fine, what about the dad?' Callie asked, knowing that the other twin was already up in the ICU.

'Oh, erm, you'll need to talk to Avery, he was with him last.'

'Thanks Bailey.' Callie said, taking Arizona's hand and walking past the surgeon and back down to the ER. They saw Mr Walker getting checked out with Jackson, Lexie filling in paperwork at the end of the bed. The younger Grey looked up and saw them standing outside, saying something to Avery before walking out and over to them.

'Hey.' She said, rather too cheerily for the morning they just experienced but still. 'How are the kids? Do you know anything?' She asked. Arizona looked down and cleared her throat, Callie squeezing her hand in comfort.

'Yeah, Sarah and Jamie are gonna be okay.' Arizona informed her. 'A few broken bones but nothing that wont heal.'

'That's good news.' Lexie smiled, but her face soon fell when Arizona didn't continue. 'What about the other two?'

'The baby, Nicholas, was gone before we could do anything. Bled out in the ER.' Arizona said, holding back a tear.

'And Sarah's twin?' Lexie prompted.

'We lost her on the table.' Callie helped Arizona finish, getting a comforting hand squeeze back in return.

'Oh my god.' Lexie said, exhaling. 'Who's going to tell Mr Walker?' She asked, looking back at the two senior surgeons.

'I am.' Arizona said firmly.

'Arizona you weren't the only doctor on the case, you don't have to…'

'Yeah, I do.' Arizona cut little Grey off. 'I am in charge of all the kids who come through those doors right now, so it is my job to talk to the parents.' She ran a hand through her hair. 'Take him up to a room and get him settled. Then page me.' She said, Lexie nodding before watching Arizona walk off, Callie not far behind.

'Arizona!' Callie called, running into the nearest on call room behind her girlfriend. 'Arizona,' She repeated quieter. The blonde set herself down on the closest bed and put her head in her hands. There were no more tears coming out because she was so tired but on the inside she was sobbing her heart out. 'Hey,' Callie said gently, sitting down next to her and placing an arm around her shoulder. 'What are you thinking?'

'That I need to tell a man that two of his children are dead.' Arizona looked up to Callie and let the brunette pull her into a tight hug.

'I'll do it with you.' Callie whispered in her ear, Arizona nodding over her shoulder and holding on tighter.

'…**Just never stop singing your song. I hadn't heard it in so long. And if I handle you with care. It doesn't mean I don't think you're strong…'**


	4. Forgive Me

**Forgive me**

They were lying in the on call room when Arizona's pager went off. She clipped it off of her scrubs and held it up for both of them to read. 'It's Lexie.' She said quietly. 'The father's ready for us.' She sighed, swinging her legs off of the bed and sitting on the edge. Callie followed suit and sat up next to her, stretching out the arm after Arizona had been lying on it.

'Are you sure you want to do this?' She asked, Arizona looking over at her with a sad smile.

'I have to do this.' Leaning in she kissed Callie on the cheek.

'Okay then, lets go.' Callie squeezed her hand and they walked out of the on call room together. They stopped outside Mr Walker's room, Dr Grey coming out after getting him settled and heading over to them.

'Dr Robbins, he's been asking about his kids.. I… I didn't know what to tell him so I said we were waiting on you… is that okay, I mean…'

'Grey, take a breath.' Callie said, putting a hand on her shoulder.

'It's fine Lexie, I'm going to talk to him now.' She smiled at the young doctor as she headed for the room. She made it a few steps when she felt Callie's hand pull her back. 'What?' She said, turning around.

'What are you going to tell him first, good or bad?' Callie wondered.

'Oh, I don't know.' She admitted, heading back to the room with Callie by her side. 'Mr Walker.' She said as she entered, standing at the foot of his bed with Callie standing off to the side.

'Yes, are you the doctor they said would tell me about..' He drifted off, the panic and worry in his eyes enough for him not to have to finish the sentence.

'Yeah, I'm Dr Robbins, head of paediatrics.' She smiled, but it didn't reach her usually bright eyes.

'So, so how are they? My kids?' He asked, tears forming in his eyes.

'Jamie has just come out of surgery, he's going to be fine but will need physical-therapy to walk again.' She told him, watching his face fall.

'But he's, he's okay?' Mr Walker looked her in the eyes.

'He's okay.' She nodded, smiling at him almost genuinely.

'And Sarah? Natalie? Nicholas?' He pleaded. Arizona swallowed looking over at Callie who nodded in support.

'Sarah is fine. She broke her wrist.'

'Okay and…'

'Mr Walker…' Arizona started but he cut her off.

'No, please just tell me.' He said, a tear falling down his face.

'Nicholas's injuries were too severe. There was too much bleeding and he died before we could get him up for surgery.'

'Oh god, no, no he's…. he's dead?' Mr Walker sobbed, laying his head in his hands.

'I am so sorry.' Arizona said, choking back tears slightly as she watched the man break in front of her.

'N..Natiale..?' He asked through his tears.

'We were able to get her up to the operating room, but that wasn't enough. We lost her on the table, we couldn't bring her back.'

'Two… two of my children are… are gone.' He cried, looking up into Arizona's eyes.

'Mr Walker…..'

'No!' He yelled at her, making her flinch back slightly and Callie prop herself up on her heels. 'You, you're meant to be the best right? I mean you're the head of whatever, but you… two of my children are dead, Dr Robbins. Two of them!' He shouted.

'Mr Walker, we did everything we could. We did our best but sometimes, sometimes that isn't enough.' Arizona tried to reason with him, holding back her own tears as she did so. He looked up at her, his tears stopped but now anger was flowing through him.

'You keep telling yourself that Dr Robbins.' He said quietly, Callie now coming up behind Arizona.

'Come on.' She whispered in her ear, Arizona's eyes still locked on those of the angry father. 'We're truly sorry for your loss, come on Arizona.' She said more firmly, pulling her backwards and out of the room. Callie had an arm around Arizona's shoulders as they left the room, the blonde in a trance as they walked over to the nurses station. Lexie and Jackson were charting as they walked over, Callie stopping to talk to them. 'Hey guys can one of you check on Mr Walker, we just, you know…' Callie looked at Arizona.

'Told him his offspring have been cut by half.' Avery said, looking up at the three female faces around him.

'Jackson.' Lexie looked at him accusingly, punching him on the arm.

'Ouch, what?' He said, smiling slightly. Lexie shook her head at him and turned back to the others. She studied Arizona's face, noticing the lack of, of anything. She was staring at something in front of her.

'Dr Robbins? Are you alright?' She asked, looking back to Callie.

'I need to take her home.' Callie said gently. 'It's been a, a hard morning.'

'Okay, yeah of course.' Lexie nodded. 'I'll page Hunt and Bailey, make sure they know you're not here.'

'Thanks Little Grey.' Callie smiled, taking Arizona by the hand and leading her away from everything.

Callie unlocked the door to their apartment and walked through, Arizona following closely behind. She hadn't said anything since talking to Mr Walker. She had just kept her eyes forward, not showing any kind of emotion. Callie removed her jacket and bag, hanging them on the coat rack and throwing her keys down in the bowl on the kitchen counter. She watched as Arizona took of her coat, lying it gently on the back of the couch. And then she broke. She clutched onto the back of the couch as the sobs rocked through her body. Callie's heart was breaking as she walked around to her, rubbing Arizona's back and trying to comfort her. Callie pulled her away from the couch and let the blonde lean into her, walking slowly around to the front of the couch and sitting down, Arizona crying into her chest. 'Shhh,' Callie stroked her hair as she cried. 'It's okay Arizona, it's okay.' A few moments later Arizona pushed herself up and slightly away from Callie. She kept their hands entwined but sat up to face her. Callie leaned in and kissed her on the lips, wiping away the tear stains and hoping she would smile.

'It's not okay, Calliope, it's not okay.' She said.

'Arizona..' Callie sighed.

'No it's not okay, and he was right.' Arizona sniffed. 'I should have done more, I should have tried harder. Tried harder to save them, all of them….'

'Arizona!' Callie stopped her rant and took both of her hands. 'You know we can't save every patient. And you did everything, don't make me tell you that again.'

'I know, I know that Calliope and I'm sorry, I just…' She dropped her head. 'Sometimes I wonder why.'

'Why what?' Callie asked, tilting Arizona's head forwards.

'Why I got into Paediatrics.' She laughed. 'I could have picked any specialty, any one. Seriously, I am that good.' She grinned, Callie laughing at her. 'But no, I had to pick the tiny humans.'

'Arizona, you are that good.' The blonde looked at her. 'That is why you are perfect for the tiny humans. And you genuinely care.'

'I know, but it's so hard.' She sighed again. 'I can't tell you the number of parents who I've had to talk to, and tell them that their child was dead. Because I couldn't help them. There's too many.'

'Okay, but what about all the parents who you've talked to, and told them their child was going to be okay?' Callie picked up her hand and kissed it. 'Trust me when I tell you that the good outweighs the bad.'

'Yeah.' Arizona smiled. 'I like the good days.'

'Exactly, think about the good days and really crappy ones like today will fade. In time they will fade.' Callie smiled. 'Now you need sleep. Because you have cried way too much and look like crap.'

'Wow, Calliope, way to cheer me up.' Arizona ran a hand through her hair as she let her girlfriend haul her off of the couch. They went into the bedroom and closed all of the blinds, lying down in the middle of the day and trying to forget the morning they just had.

'…**.Lord I don't know what I'm struggling for. There's got to be more. Than this life I know. But still I'm here fighting to never give up. I find strength in your love. And you will see me through…'**

**The end**

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><p><strong>Thanks for reading! Tell me if this was any good or if i should stick to Glee! <strong>

**X:)X**


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